If Michael Jackson had not turned completely wacky and worshiped his plastic surgeon, what would he look like today?
This computer simulation of his face shows a completely different person!

Another Phucked Video, what can I say?  It starts a little slow, but after about 2 minutes the truly Phucked starts!

The  Putrid Sex Object makes 2 Girls 1 Cup look like Sesame Street!

Thanks to "cornflakegirl" for the heads up on this latest phucked video, The Putrid Sex Object

It seems like almost every girl I date these days owns a cat.  What's with girls and their cats?
Now if they owned one of these freaks, I might not have to pretend to like their furry pussies!

Yoda, the cat with four ears

Bailey, weighing in at 26lbs!


Apparently his favorite food is popcorn!  Can you say "Diet"...?

Last night very well may have been the first time I've ever fisted a guy in the ass.

Details soon. Maybe.

1. Oral Sex is illegal in 18 states
   
2. In Virginia, it is illegal to have sex with the lights on
   
3. It is illegal for husbands in Willowdale, Oregon, to talk dirty during intercourse
   
4. Sexual intercourse between unmarried couples is illegal in Georgia
   
5. Engaging in any sexual position other than missionary is illegal in Washington, DC
   
6. In Connorsville, Wisconsin, it is illegal for a man to shoot off a gun when his female partner is having an orgasm
   
7. In Harrisburg, Pennsylvania, it is illegal to have sex with a truck driver inside a toll booth
   
8. Having sexual relations with a porcupine is illegal in Florida
   
9. It is illegal in Utah to marry your first cousin before the age of 65
   
10. Sex with animals is perfectly legal for men in Washington state, as long as the animal weighs less than 40 pounds

Some of these make sense.  But is there any reader out there who has not yet broken the law?

Me?  Off to jail I go...

I suppose even with someone who is as sexually experienced as me, there is still a first time for everything.

One night, I had the hot idea of inviting this gorgeous Naval Officer up that I had met in San Diego for a night with me, and he agreed to come up.

When we start fooling around, he was the first one to dive into foreplay. I'm on my hands and knees while he's going down on me and at some point or another, decides to stick his fingers inside. I end up on my backside and about twenty minutes into it, he's still fingering me but at some point he had slipped in an extra finger. I LOVE being fingered as that is the easiest way to get me to climax and he had just the right hands for it. So about another ten minutes go by and I have my 5th orgasm (not joking) and he has managed to slip an extra one in there.

As time went on, my screams got louder and eventually went from being screams of joy to screams of pain without my realizing it. I finally thought, "This really isn't normal for me to be screaming like this." Even HE was trying to get me to shut up. I look down and I don't see any free fingers, so of course I have to ask.

"Dude, what are you doing?"
"What? Ah've got muh entar fist in thar!" (he's from the South)
"WHAT? NO NO NO NO NO! STOP!"

He withdraws, continues going down on me, then REINSERTS four fingers back into my birth canal.

"HEY!"
"Oh, that's so hot, baby. You know you want this."
"NO NO NO NO, I DON'T WANT THIS!"

And in between the "no no noes," I manage to climax again as he had reinserted his thumb in between my fleshy walls and his inner palm. He went deeper.

"OH MY GOD, STOP."

I was freaked out. I had never been fisted before.

"You sure you want me to stop? You sound jes' like yer enjoyin' it!"
"STOP, JUST STOP. OH MY GOD."
"Well, awright."

We finish our foreplay and get to the dickin' (which was actually quite delightful as I came about another three times). After we're finished, I had to ask him.

"So, how far in did you get?"
"Oh, about this far."

He makes an elongated left fist and demonstrates how far in by cupping his right hand just a half inch above his left wrist.

I was in pain for many days after that.

Women's lib taken too far perhaps?

What the Phuck is going on in High Schools in Boston?
17 teenage school girls, many less than 16 years of age have become pregnant in a "pregnancy pact"
They have entered into a pact to have their babies together over the year.

"Some girls seemed more upset when they weren't pregnant than when they were," Gloucester High School principal Joseph Sullivan told Time magazine.

Local officials said at least some of the men involved in the pregnancies were in their mid-20s, including one man who appeared to be homeless. Others were boys in the school.

What are these girls thinking?  It will be fun to have baby as a teenage girl?
The men in their 20s will probably end up with statutory rape charges and they will ALL end up paying for the next 18 years with child support! 

Guys.  If you ever need a reason to ALWAYS wear a rubber, this is it!

This is for sure the most Phucked Up article of the week!